Amazing people who make me go on n on n on:)

31 March, 2011

My take on the Semi-Finals, MY way!


So how did I spend my day on 30th March, when 99% of the human beings and conceivably some species of animals also in Mother India sat glued before their idiot box and the remaining 1% were perhaps straining their bodies in Mohali stadium in Chandigarh or busy updating gyan on Twitter and Facebook, bringing to life their latent dreams of becoming cricket commentators and critics, rolled in one? Waah, such vast talent in India, lying undiscovered-not of players, of people who have so much to opine, whine and declare crime!

My god-calling India a cricket crazy nation is an understatement. And fortunately or unfortunately I am not a part of this flock that eats, drinks, sleeps cricket when normally you are just expected to watch it and move on. But na ji na...our nazuk naak and the rest of the body and some people’s zindagi bhar ki kamai depends on this one sport, which at the end of the day is just a sport.

The day India beat Australia to reach to the semi-finals was another ordinary day for a boring housewife like me. At 10.30 p.m. I take my beloved daughter for her one hour ritual of beckoning Goddess Sleep. Suddenly the thunderous sounds of crackers broke the serenity of an otherwise solemn night. And in the middle of March, when Diwali was months behind or is months ahead, I knew it had to be one and only cricket responsible for blackening the skies a little more.

12 midnight and Seeya slowly succumbs to the lure of Madam Sleep and I log in on Facebook to catch up with all that I missed during the day yes, facebook times are now either on the shit pot at dawn or after darkness falls...sigh! And do I get a thorough summary of almost ball by ball account on my friends' statuses! Innovation was at peak as hitherto lesser mortals, as far as writing catchy statuses are concerned, were churning out one smart ass after another talking of statuses still of course. My poor fingers and thumb were tired of “liking” them all yes, I was almost thinking of what body parts to use now to express my deep admiration that must be expressed. Men and women were walking shoulder to shoulder, without any gender bias in making Facebook seem like the blue-book. And I was also enlightened on the fact that 30th March would hereby be a war by any proportions.  

Cut to THE day: Now my beloved, who is not a cricket fanatic, so far as other normal citizens like my brother are concerned (read his status-Office Holiday: CHECK, Wife Out Of Room: CHECK, Cheerleaders: DOUBLE CHECK, Chilled Beers: CHECK, Pizzas: CHECK, 2nd Innings @ Felix: CHECK, India f@#$in Pak: CHECK.. All CHECKED, now BRING IT ON) was suddenly behaving weird nopes, we don’t need to call a doctor. He overnight became a cricket enthusiast-finally I guess, the nation calls you on duty and stirs dormant patriotic streaks in all individuals at the time of crisis-whoaaa...what crap am I talking! Anyways, he got up in the morning and ordered a 32 inches LED television set that my mother-in-law had been pestering him to get from months. Grrrr- I don’t know what made me grumpier: the fact that he suddenly and without seeking my super valuable advice, had turned into an extremist that I would not have approved/ advocated or the fact that my pesterings are never as effective as hers squinting the eyes and raising one eyebrow in the unbelievable typical fashion of the saas-bahu serials that she watches all day and I have to bear them when passing by.

Putting Seeya to sleep, for her one-hour siesta in the noon, I turn again to Facebook for some solace and it was like any other news channel, where the masses were giving free and unsolicited but so-thought expert advice, right from the toss to the boss. Some gifted individuals were updating statuses within every few minutes, making me wonder if they were more diligently cricketing or facebooking! I saw Sachin being compared to God and comments about him having many lives. Now, had I been Anjali Tendulkar, I would have been seriously worried, but as I am not sigh multiplied by 1000, I let it pass. Here I am unable to manage my own ONE life; I expressed mute sympathies and log out.

I woke Seeya up. Got her dressed and took her out on the pram for our customary one hour walk in the lush green HBTI College campus, where she says ‘Hi!’ and ‘bye!’ to every bhaiyyas and didis passing by and even raises her cheeselings that I put on the board before her saying “aa-aa” to them I give them a half apologetic and half explanative look that says I know you guys are not cows as we beckon cows in this way but she’s just a kid, forgive her. She thinks it is her moral duty to feed cheeseslings to everyone tumbling down the road from cows to watchmen to students, as though we live in Somalia and the poor souls would succumb and perish without the generosity shown from her end.

Anyways, much to our shock, the campus was deserted today. I make her pass her time by pointing to cars/motor bikes/cycles and walkers passing by but today the road was as empty as my hot chocolate fudge cup after I lick clean every bit of it, when I don’t have sophisticated company. So much inflation, I can at least make my contribution by saving on the washing powder, that would be expended on uncontaminating that cup. See, a little speck of thoughtfulness and we can save our planet.

Anyways, coming back again, there were very poor visibility of human specimens- actually there were a couple of couples in the gardens, making good use of the fact that nobody 'known' would bump into them today. That’s what we call ‘Incredible India’-we know the ways and means. But I couldn’t point to them now, could I? And neither could I tell her look at that bhaiyya and didi for they weren’t so for each other, na?

A handful of motor cycles passed by with youngish looking boys that made me raise my eyebrows now not for what you think silly. I was wondering that something must be wrong with these kids maybe they were retarded/ had violent family backgrounds/ unhappy childhood/ inferiority complex and the likes for how else would they manage to un-cling to their homes and the television sets. And before you blame me saying ulta chor kotwal ko daante, aise mein nahi, normal perceptions hain. I know I would be heavily lambasted after this post, you wait and watch for being an outsider or even gaddar for writing anything not pro-cricket, especially with an Indo-Pak match at hand I can already hear “How could you?” and see accusing fingers pointing at me.

As soon as we reached the entrance gate of the boys hostel, to cross it on our sojourn, we were shaken out of our wits by the loudest of cheers from inside. Sigh! If only it was to welcome my presence, I would not have minded the rude interruption of my sweet reverie, but for a match...ah! To top it, I received a message: Today is National Women’s day! A lot of mothers and sisters would be remembered from 2. 30 pm onwards. Ah...eeeenough...time to head back.

It is 7 pm and G has just returned home early today- not because he thought of babysitting Seeya one evening out of the two months since the maid’s untimely departure no, she’s not dead so save the condolence letters for me or not because he thought of taking a long walk in the nice weather with his daughter’s mother. But because the new television set was coming and he wanted to watch the match in peace. “Baby, will you please take Seeya and sit in the other room till the match gets over?”

Huh? What? Whoa?
And the rest like they say is history.

P.S. My woes list refuses to peter out:
1. I was left wondering through the day if stingy mobile service companies had cruelly  connived to cancel the blessed free SMS packs today akin on festivals, etc and for every vella forward that I forwarded in vellapanti, I was being charged double so that they could sponsor more such dumb matches.

2. I have had a tough time explaining Holi and Diwali to little Seeya. Now why in God’s name and all that is holy and pure, was a mini Diwali being celebrated this night when the country’s complaining of lack of funds...it would take more than all my blogging skills to explain and more than all her comprehending skills to grasp.

3. Over excited husbands after such victories evoke over-doubled efforts from already over-fuming and neglected wives to calm them down for more things than one :(


All said and done...we won...and happy cricketing anyways! :) 


23 comments:

Blasphemous Aesthete said...

Okay, count me in the remaining 0% who were not glued to any TV or live stream. Just cricinfo.com for ball by ball updates. Not that the TV was too far off, but I was a lil engrossed somewhere.
Nevertheless, the cheering roar that came after each smashing that the ball got, from the neighbouring harbour point where every cricketing lunatic of my year was pinned to the television constantly gave me the pump to refresh again and again to know what happened, despite of what state I was languishing in.
All in all, we won, and that is what matters.

:)
Seeya might just become an altruist. :P :)

Cheers,
Blasphemous Aesthete

Amrit said...

Suruchi,

Are you testing us if we read your blog carefully or not? India beat Australia to reach Semi Final....

(The day India beat Australia to reach to the quarter finals was..)

Alka Gurha said...

Your predicament strikes a chord here...2 more days to go before the nation goes berserk again.....Hopefully. But after a season of scams, celebrations are welcome.
Shit pot, dawn or dusk,u rock and ur readers roll!

jo said...

Hehe! What can I say? I guess it would suffice to say that I'm among those 90%.
People have all the rights to go crazy...after all cricket is one of the few things we Indians manage to do right at times. :P

Sameera said...

Wooh.. Such an amazing description by a Cricket dwara satayi gai naari.. ;)
Its always great to read your write ups :)

Bikram said...

As usual loved it and Not good not good Seeyas sleep getting spoilt now thats not good ..
dont worry about your FB time areeeee ...

And yeah Cricket is religion which everyone ok almost all follow its agood thing maybe that can unite us all..

I had taken a DAY off :) he he hehe
and now Saturday and MY bad luck , I had asked for fri-mon-tues day off So i could come ot india to watch the finals that has been cancelled .. And I am on duty saturday so GOD knows how i will maange to see the finals NOT HAPPY ME.

I spent a lot of time on Twitter on 30th and had a fun time with all the blogger friends ..

I think Seeya ko bhi cricket sikhana padega, so she can also have some fun and enjoy ...

Cant wait for today to be over MUMBAI here we comeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee :)

Bikram's

Suruchi said...

Hi BA,
I am sooooooooooo interested in knowing what kept you a little “engrossed”:-)
And then there is also a “state that you were languishing in”
My god-this is more interesting than the world cup itself:-)

And yes Seeya would become an altruist:-)

Suruchi said...

Hey A,
Thank you so much ...you checked my boat right in time before it got doobo-ed in its own stupidity:(
And this goes to prove I am not just technically duh but also cricketally-challenged:(

Hehe...made the changes...thanks again...
And wowo...you do read my blog carefully;-)

Suruchi said...

Hi Alka,
You are such a cute heart:-)
And thank god I have found some echo here.
But I guess for most people, the Indo-Pak match was THE World Cup:-)

And when you say I rock and roll, I say, you join me for you do pretty much the same if not better:-)

Suruchi said...

Hey Jo,
So right...it is the one thing that we do right:-)
Wow...I really love the passion we Indians can churn out.
Hope you are having fun:-)

Suruchi said...

Hiyya Sameera,
Cricket dwara satayi nahi yaar...
Generally satayi hue naari...hey bhagwan, mujhe kab samjhege duniya????
Kay, before even bhagwan says “hey bhagwan”, drama time over:-)
Thanks a ton honey for always stopping by!:-)

Suruchi said...

Hi Biky,
Hain na...bechare Seeya...and bechaare Seeya ke ma?;-)

Awww...aapko chutthi nahi mile...chutti kar dene the na boss ke...unko pata nahi kiss se panga le rahe hain?
:-)

But please don’t be sad...aap wahin se apne sheron waale cheers karna and yahan Mumbai tak pahunch jaayege I am sure:-)
Here’s hoping for a rocking finals for you and all Indians:-)

Amrit said...

@Suruchi,

Just to let you know that India vs. SL final has been postponed by one week to give more time to practice..

Haddock said...

The madness called Cricket.....
For me I reached home half an hour early after work (not to watch the match, but the roads were deserted and no traffic, so my Co. bus driver could just fly past)
Saw the last few overs and thats it.
Now what about tomorrow?

Rià said...

he he i admit even i succumbed to the cricket frenzy that day and tomorrow being the finals its goin to be even more crazier!!

Suruchi said...

Haaaaaaaaaaaaw A,
Abhi meine maan liye ke mein dim hoon...aap fused banane pe kyon tulle hue ho...
Abhi itna to mereko bhi pata lag gaya ke aap mujhe April Fool bana rahe hain:-)

Suruchi said...

Hi Haddock,
Long time?:)
Wow...it feels so nice to see normal people:-)
Today is relatively less mad..
But then I guess I am not so glued in the picture to really know:-)

Hope to see you around!

Suruchi said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Suruchi said...

@Ria,
Hope you are having fun now!
And it's okay to succumb once in a while...warna hum perfect nahi ho jaayenge:-)

My Dream Canvas said...

Loved your pos:-) You have a nice blog. I am following you. Hope to see you at My Dream Canvas. Take care Anu

Miles Of Style said...

finally!! someone who shares my sentiments when it comes to cricket and all those cricket related FB and BB updates. i was just about ready to puke reading sooo many of those silly, racist comments!

thank God India won or else it'd have been all over the TV, papers, sms as to why we lost, were the matches fixed or not, who pulled what ropes etc etc ::rolling my eyes upwards:: just thinking of the torture! :P :P

p.s. new giveaway on my blog: http://onestylemile.blogspot.com/2011/04/monday-morning-giveaway.html

Jack said...

Suruchi,

Craze is like SHATRANJ KE KHILADI, isn't it? MARNE MAARNE KI NAUBAT TAQ AA GAYI THI at places due to difference in opinions. Anyway, had a good laugh at the way you put it across. I pray Seeya remains sane like mother when she grows up.

Take care

Suruchi said...

Hi Anu,
Thank you and you would find me around your blog soon:-)


Hi Persis,
I know...the way life just stops in India during these matches...it is amazing:-)


Hi Uncle J,
My god...I hope you didn't mean the opposite when you call Seeya's mother sane..hehe:-)
Thank you for the wishes:-)

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