My Understanding of Women and Men!

•    A woman will not expect a man to impress her, but she expects him to try.

•  Women fantasize more than men.

• A woman does not relate to why his palm sized techy gadget should cost a world but expects him to understand that one single pea sized diamond is worth it.

•  A woman wants you to tell the truth whenever she says, “Tell me honestly” and later wishes she had not asked you in the first place.

• She may spend her better years professing how she wants X-Y-Z qualities in her man and also proudly declare in the same breath how she always falls for the opposite.

• She knows there is no ‘happily ever after’ but she pines forever for the Prince Charming to come along.

• A woman expects a man to share all his work tensions with her but does not expect him to expect her to remember about it when questioned later.

•  Most women are more in love with the idea of being in love than a person.

• A woman may speak for hours and then end by saying, “I somehow find it difficult to express what I really feel.”

• You would hear this more often coming from a woman’s mouth than a man’s, “Something is missing in my life/I don’t feel good inside today but don’t ask me why” when she would bloody well know what and why.

•  Women would like you to open doors of restaurants for her and pull the chair before they rest their cute butts on it; but they may throw a tantrum of equality and accusations of biases when you say, “It is not a woman’s job.”

• When they say “I am in a bad mood and want to be left alone”, they actually want your company the most.

• Most women can handle alcohol, men and women better than most men.

• A woman knows that her man may not have the best of voices but she loves to have him use it to sing for her.

• The speed with which a woman says "Nothing" when asked "What's wrong?" is inversely proportional to the shitstorm that's coming. 

• She dresses less for herself and more for others.

• Women use their smiles to get away with ANYthing.

• When she is in her teens the older men are always more appealing and when she is not, the youngsters are suddenly so bloody hot.

• Women are of three kinds: high maintenance, low maintenance and those who think they are low maintenance but are actually high maintenance*thank you Billy Crytsal for this superbly quotable quote*

• Women may age in their bodies but never in their minds.

Now the man’s point of view:

• A man knows his wife would never agree to a threesome; but he believes that miracles do happen.

• He would expect the woman to understand if he had a fling; but he wants her to understand not to expect the same from him.

• Men always like options.

• Men have better traffic sense but poorer sixth sense.

•  A man may want to bed a woman but not wed her and the one he weds is not always the one he beds.

• Watching television is the greatest stress buster and porn is god's gift to mankind.

• A man may crib about all those woman’s magazines that crowd the washroom space; but in his private enthroning on the pot, these become his philosophers, friends and guides .

•   Men are better flirts than women.

• A man may grin big time when he elucidates about his skills in bed to his guy friends; but he would frown big time about his woman doing the same to her guy friends.

• A man would not mind ogling at other women but gets all ‘saala, kutta-kamina’ when someone eyes his.

• He would mock at gatherings about how women love to gossip; but after the party, he would corner his woman like in an interrogation about who rules the gossip-vines and how.

• A man would not really talk to his woman on the phone while in the work space; but when she stops calling on him there, he would wonder what is wrong.  

•  For a man, some sex is good, more is better and too much is just about right.

• A man would crave for a woman till she is a chase and when she ceases to be one, he goes in a haze. Hard to get are always harder to forget.

• Men get better with age*don't ask me in what*.

• A man loves compliments just as much as a woman does, if not more.

• For a man, the relationship is on the rocks only when the sex decreases.

• Most men actually talk more than women, contrary to the popular myth and listen lesser, as is an established age-old fact.

• Men use alcohol as a reason and justification for making passes. They always test the waters before wadding in.

That’s about it from three decades of dealing with both the sexes, in different measures of course! Happy Gender Dealing!:-)