28 July, 2009
What hurts a person the most?
What hurts a person the most? Food for thought...
The amount of food I have for thought with me...phew! No wonder I am unable to attain that elusive zero figure...
I keep munching and gobbling on it all the bloody time!
Small little things of everyday life prick us all and leave scars that last a long while...the bigger hurts we are able to handle, the seemingly less important ones continue to nibble at us within.
The most common human stumbling block in this is the lack of importance from those whom we love...
Nothing can be worse than that!
To be the centre of the world for someone and then just not come within his or her revolutionary orbit!
The feeling then that...was the love showered on me just a case of the shooting star passing by or like a meteor hitting upon my surface leaving a burnt dent in me before disappearing onto nothingness?
So much planetary allusions, you must be wondering...
Well, it is like a planetary conspiracy...the famous saying...maybe it’s written in the stars....
Not just in the love between a man and a woman, it transpires most obviously in all our relations. Daughters getting married and leaving for the husband’s abode, causes them both to wonder have the strands of attachment been stretched too far? Brothers and sisters who have grown up sharing all their secrets with each other suddenly realize that there are more people entering that cosy comfort zone which they proudly safeguarded as their own.
It is said that in true love there is no possession...it’s more important to let go...but then equally true is something else that’s said...it’s easier said than done. Of course after the initial while, the heart and mind gets used to of the person not being around. But those just-been-stricken days, are excruciating to say the least and almost like someone pulled away the ground from our feet and the grounds we so contentedly stood tall on.
I would like to provide you with a key here...the key to survive such a catastrophe...but the irony here is that I just have questions and no answers. Despite going through it umpteenth of times in terms of my own experience and narration of others’ woe tales with the same...I have not yet learnt to live and tell. I have found no keys of how to deal with being shunned from importance like on the first day, first one week or maybe even the term of the first month...whatever the prolonged status of mess is considering the depth of relations. Sooner or later it would pass but then how do we make ourselves strong enough to deal with it when it arrives or its realization does in the form of the popping up symptoms?
It is said expectations are the seeding grounds of disappointments. If you expect nothing you will never get disappointed. But then aren’t we all made of the basic fabric of expectations? If we plant a seedling in the beds of our garden, would it be too unwise to expect it to mature? If we get home a puppy that jumps around us wagging its tail, is it unreasonable to expect it to continue doing so when it outgrows itself in dimensions? If we crave for our beds each night after gruelling days, is it very demanding to expect to go into a deep sleep of peace and rejuvenation?
We as humans are not unreasonable and it’s time we accept that. If I demand to be treated in a certain way, please be bloody sure that I have earned to deserve it. However, equally sure should be me that I am not over doing my demanding act. Before rights come responsibilities. I need to fulfil my duties to earn my pleasure and leisure. I need to give to be able to get. I must be less sentimental to match with the pragmatic world.
I should change me before attempting to alter the way the world thinks. And like a dear friend of mine insists after every debate we have about the essence of things in the world...ACCEPTANCE of it all ends in peace of body, mind and soul.
What hurts now would heal someday and the scars might disappear if we stop noticing them every now and then! When He provides you the wounds, he also makes arrangements for the balm...we just need to be more observant to perceive it! Also perhaps what hurts the most reaffirms its value to us and thereby reasserts the need to double in efforts to strengthen it! What hurts the most makes us seek elsewhere for that which provides us the most delight too! May each one succeed in his journeys!