Amazing people who make me go on n on n on:)

11 October, 2009

Men n Libidos and Women n Head-aches!


The eternal combo of wrangle off the shelf...Men have been inseparable from the carnal sin and women have been too attached to their head ache woes or so they project! Just as men would continue to feel horny, women would continue to find that corny!
And so they live spitefully ever after!

It’s amazing how differently as species or kinds, we are programmed. Take a man anywhere and he’d turn and return to sex. You tell him the weather is awesome and he’d snap back with...ya, the perfect setting for mad, wild sex! Tell him you feel hot and pat would come the reply...you need to shed off your clothes darling and release that heat in the sack. Tell him that you feel dull today and the solution would be exciting in-the-sheet activities to get the adrenalin pumping and pepping you up. A woman needs to just get close...a simple embrace is not so simple and a touch of a woman is not just that- a touch...it has “far reaching” consequences. For men the world begins and ends at sex. Yes, it does...no point in denying that wise guy and no point in defending him about it dear lady!

A wise dear friend of mine says...sex for an average Indian guy takes about 7 minutes, including the car park time and that of shedding the garbs! Hmm...Very profound must say! So just for this seven minute sprint and maybe a minute of orgasmic pleasure...they spend their lives fantasising and conspiring to get laid and keep getting there. Women, it’s no rocket science, are constituted a bit differently. While a miniscule section may differ, the majority cannot have it every day or at the drop of a hat, they can’t drop it all...unless they feel a kinda connection and arousing yearning.

So since the other general excuses are not perennial...like it’s the those-four-days time, I had a long day at office and I am tired, you’ve eaten too much and hence too heavy to come on top...I’ve eaten too much and hence spare me the drill...I was busy doing your mother’s errands all day, etc, etc...The best option left ultimately is of headache, for it can come out anytime and anywhere, to timely rescue...But just check dear ladies that he may be toying with the idea of taking you for shopping after the hot session...So this path should be carefully trodden!

The head aches vs. sex stories have been infamous through history....here are some such topical jokes that commit to my memory, despite me being pathetic at conniving them on short notice...

(1) A husband one night, just before they were going to sleep, brought a glass of water and a tablet of Aspirin to his wife and told her to have it...She was utterly puzzled and said, “But why? I don’t have a head-ache!” With a wicked smile on his face he retorted, “Ok then, since it’s confirmed, take off your clothes and let’s have hot wild sex”.

(2) Man to friend: After years of marriage finally my wife and I have become sexually compatible. Now we both get head-aches at the same time!

(3) Santa was sucking his fingers and kissing his palms...when asked why, he said, “My wife has a head ache, so this is foreplay before self-help”.

And many more that I’ve heard down the ages, read in messages on mobile and mails... and thus the infamous tangle continues! Men would continue to be fixated and women continue to be frustrated about running out of excuses to dodge. We continue to wonder why men are so imaginative and skilled before and during the act...not realizing that they are plugged into a genius- that’s we the women kind! If only we women learn to crib less and be just as creative! If only the men also realize to be just as inspired in related areas and give romance a thumbs-up over lust!

Just as the fairer sex releases her latent tangles by talking, the superior sex gets de-stressed by taking out “things” to their beloved. So instead of the bicker and battle...let’s understand and rattle the bed...to bring a rocking calm and climax to both ends....of the mind I mean and the body would comply too. For most normal men, sex at most normal times, is a necessity and not just need. For most normal women at most normal times, sex is a desire and not just a drive. We don’t need to compromise...we need to adapt and empathise...so that we don’t live spitefully ever after...but happily ever after! Amen!

9 comments:

MOHAMMED FARHAN KHAN said...

hahaha...very good post ..u understnd quite well about men's qualities....
its bad that u r comparing libido with men, why not with women...?

suruchi said...

Thanks MFK...sounded like SRK...cool types so use kiya here..actually it seems that relationship fundas are all I know of..hehe;)
U agree with me and still ask why I connect men to libidos?...Well women get connected to this then by default, right?;)
Happy day to u

Amnn.......//1! said...

okie gottta telll by far the best this is the best post i have ever read ....!!!!!

Amnn.......//1! said...

n ohh i cudn help but notice .. u call men the superior sex ..all through out the post ,....now i don think tats true...
i think now a days gals r the superior sex.. its their say that counts now a days

suruchi said...

Wow Amnn...You just made my day with such a BIG...as in bold, big statement...thankssssssss...:)

And "the superior sex" statement is more of an ironic comment than anything else...we were taught so in some stupid school books n the brain continues to map the same...

Big thumbs up to your thought waise..of siding with us females...
Veeeeerrrrry appreciated:)

sobhit said...

hmmm... 2 much being written abt sex des days i guess.... evry 3rd post on sm random blog turns out 2b realted 2 d sexual desires n stuff :P :P.. probably its d same ol funda 2 increase d viewership in dis case readers.. 1 item no n public will come rushin in :P :P....hehehehhehe

i dint not find nething new in d post.must sayin by ur standards ,as f wot all posts i'v read til now..dis1 ws disappointing :-/... u defin8ly r capable f n cud hv had added more humuor 2it.. alas u mite have had sm headache :P :P....
bwwuuuaaahahahahhahahahhahaha
tho it seems tym n again u keep on adding d spice rathr sm takda 2 ut posts :P :P....
read ur previuos post 2 where u were decodin sm females statmnts 4d men.. interesting tho again dats out in d open 4 long now my frnd... evry 3 male knws d hidden meaning or shud i say v r capble of reading btween n lines now... only v read alil 2 much smtyms :P :P.... but den u cant blame us... only u ladies lyk 2 mk it complicated.. like u said complex speices u women r...
some wise man said men r simple al dey want is food n sex :P :P... den y mk things complxd...
tho i dnt understnd y SEX.. des 3 words mk eyebrows rise here n der if muttrd... its as normal as nethign else.. aftr al D ALMIGHTY GOD himself deviced it 4d humans,, der r many odr things 2 think abt den tryin 2 understnd sex.... like 1 can try 2 understnd d opposite SEX rather :P :P... now v men r gud reading btween d line... i dbt abt our bttr hafs tho :P :P

P.S. http://lifetheblessedhellride.blogspot.com/2009/08/schizophrenic-conversations.html

here is a link 2 d only SEXUAL posts i wrote :P :P well not in d literal sense ..read it n c 4 urself wen u get tym...

P.P.S. u will encounter n number of spelling errors in d abve post..n ya hv fun decodin d shorthands 2 :P :P

will c who has d last laf bwuuahahahahahahahahahha

suruchi said...

Hey sobhit....
U are quite a funny guy urself...to say that I didn’t add humour here coz I may be having a head ache myself...LMAO:-)
I am sorry to have disappointed u buddy....actually u have put up high up on this pedestal from where I feel a tad nervous of meeting up with your expectations...Keeping my fingers crossed though:-)

Yup...n better to understand the opposite SEX than sex itself...Great line, eh? I am sure in the natural course it would follow anyways;-)
Sex posts are not like item numbers to increase viewership...issues of physicalities are now increasingly coming out in the open...no longer do we shy or go “hooow haiiii” when this three letter word is mentioned...It is dominating more n more lives as a good sexual experience is quite close to a kinda spiritual upliftment...I don’t know if I am making sense now...:-(
It’s not that the men or women are complicated...the entire human race was built in that way itself...I guess god gave us sex as a consolation in the confusion;-)

Going to check out ur link now:-)

sobhit said...

hahahahah seems lyk u went in2 dan brown's da vinci code wala funda n got d moment f orgasm equated 2 dat spiritual upliftmnt stuff n all... :P :P... chalo suite urself ....sure d hooowwww haaiii days r gone n dats remarkable for dat helps hypocrisy fade away.. only wid freedom f speech v wud not want odr hypocrisies 2 seap in.... not talkin of u but u nvr knw whose readin ur post :P :P.... alwaz 3% error involvd... well u wudnt knw 4 technicality isnt best 4 u ;P bwwuuhahahahahhahahahahaha

P.S. kool u droppd on2 my link n glad i dint fail 2 surprise u dat 2 pleasntly :P :P... only d link i droppd u was 4d post named

'schizophrenic-conversations'

dat mite b a bttr read 4u :P... rest toh mein pata ni kya kya likhta rehta hun... not easy 4 ppl 2 digest it :P :P.... n u gona change my innonce in2 guily hehehheheehhe yeh kaisi baat hui ma'am... hope none f ur students read al d commnts 2 ;P ;p.... thnx neways... as 4my picture u jst mite find it on facebook :P :Phappy writings n reading in dis case cya

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