My "Other" Woman!

(Warning: Sexual innuendos ahead...frisk at your risk!)

Now before I tell you about the “other” woman in my life, we need to walk down our history first. Yes, it is flashback time folks. Let’s call her X kyonki naam loongi to badnaam ho jaayege na aur mein to general knowledge mein shareef hoon he. X and I are both kick-arse Punjaban kudis and we met post our weddings god was merciful on our husbands and nopes it does not mean that we’ve had multiple marriages. There were instant sparks (yes, an actual short circuit occurred at the venue) and roses smooched each other (we happened to be wearing floral print kurtas when we hugged). See, I might exaggerate but I neeeeever lie.

We were magnetic and bonded almost like Siamese twins-she is pretty, witty, oozing with oomph, flirty and fun okay, I stop complimenting myself here now. We got clicked while giving flying kisses that happened to hit our cheeks, she declared to the world how soft my arms were, which she refused to get her fingers off and whenever I wore a top that rose too up, she always HAD TO manually bring it a little down saying-have it, flaunt it.

Soon hugs became longer and lingering much to no one’s discomfort. Of course the women became bitchy, but then they do they ever need a reason to transform into being one? “How cheap can some people be!” was crooned a couple of times coming out of mouths with noses above them raised to the sky. While the men watching us weren’t complaining-in fact we were often encouraged to drink and get “more comfortable”. Tch, tch, how dumb can the horny man’s mind be for sure, imagining/praying that it might lead to us making out on the couch....sigh!

Soon gossip mongers began to set up their little ventures around our vicinity and at one late night get-together, we could actually see them flourish every time we whispered insane things in each other’s ears followed by teens-like giggles. Little did the guys realise that we were sizing them up all this while giving them blasphemous and mad ratings of their skills in bed based on their physical bearings and our assumptions of their interior possessions yes, we have self-proclaimed and publically defamed degrees in that...sign up for evaluation? We were just 23 years old then by the way just stating before you decide I am a wild child still. We even marked our territories to avoid conflict of interests as some were ticked in both our lists-fetishes were being redefined. Although the next morning of course we realized it was not a wise idea to drink as though it were 21^st December, 2012. Often we would let people think whatever they wanted just to enjoy their half amused, half aghast and half tongue lolling faces and please, there can be three halves in a hypothetical world just as there are threesomes for many of you in your imagination. 

Cut to the more placid present now: A little while back as an anniversary special week, a multiplex played movies of diverse genres for varied tastes. For women there was ‘Sex and the City-2’. Now I am a die-hard Carrie Bradshaw fan although the lesser mortal who missed it when it came the first time around sacrificing motherhood, thy name is Suruchi. Since dearly beloved thought it was too ‘womanly’ for his otherwise very woman-preferring tastes, I had to grab another of my species to take me to this paradise. Who else but X and just to clear the air I did not actually “grab” anything to lure her into this! Often I just need to ask and I get it.

We decided to go by ourselves trying to popularize the “Two is company and three is crowd” theory. However, mischief bound, we decided to upload it as a twisted status on our Facebook and BBMs just to create a little flutter. And boy, there was more action off-screen than on-screen since many of our close friends tease us about what's cooking between us, even after they know we suck at cooking-no puns intended.

In the home front with my beloved:

G: Really, why do you girls need to go alone? And that too for a movie that’s about SEX?

Me (in convincingly put-on anguish): Oh sweet lord...just because it has the word SEX in the title that does not mean there is going to be sex in it? (although I was secretly hoping there would be some sensuous stuff at least)

G: There won’t? Strange then, why would people want to go for it anyway?

Me: Grrrr...

G: Okay fine, at least tell me what all happened then and if possible, message me in between?

Me: You want to know what happens in the movie???????

G: No silly, what happened between YOU TWO-I mean there would be darkness, your winter shawls giving the right camouflage, not many in the audience and knowing how tharki both of you are....give me minute by minute detail, okay? Then I won’t feel too bad that I didn’t get to watch.....the movie that is! (And he actually did a holding-his-stomach-and-laugh).

Me (rolling my tongue over the upper lip, followed by a cute pout that muaahs, like I do when I see a KFC burger-this was like having the breast piece): If you want we can take the camera...live action? (a lusty wink)

G: Besharam, tum dono ka koi bharosa nahi waise-go and have fun!

On the social networking status front, here are some of the updates and inbox messages that kept pouring in through the two hours of the movie:

Mr As: Lucky you, I wish I could see ‘Sex and the City’ too in the same hall as you both and since I’ve seen the movie, I won’t need to make an excuse of watching you both instead.

Mr Fu: Wow, two hot women alone in a dark hall...I hope the men in the audience don’t come? Non-metaphorically speaking...

Mr Chu: You could have created less noise about it...now look what you’ve done to ordinary mortals who don’t get to watch “Sex...” and yet think about it!

Mr Ku: Did you get your hands on it finally-the tickets that is?

Mr Bc: I hope you haven’t been lured by those horny behind-the-counter guys to take straws-I hate it when people suck the drinks out in the middle of a quiet moment...

Beloved G: Mere Ganga maile to nahi ho gaye? Mooh kaala kar liya ki abhi naak baaki hain?

Mr Mc: There may be some biting moments in the movie...please keep your fingers and teeth to yourselves or at least don’t leave scratches.

X’s Husband: To kahan tak pahunche? Ache hain? Arre movie yaar!

Phew! Such wise brains all racking whatever little they have to make us rock the sack or rather the seats in this case. While we two seedhe saade Bharatiya pativrata pavitra naaris just had a ball-watching a fun film, hooting a little, taking a couple of cosy clicks for the kicks, sighing at the only proper single kiss on screen, discussing the men in our lives and making a promise that we’d go for an all girls trip too very soon...probably to Bangkok. As for some action between us-naah, we are too busy in being fixated with the male anatomy and attitude to get distracted just by a pair of good boobs-at least for now!

But then seriously, what is with you men and the craving to watch women together? Really! And just checked the newspaper-there is a new comedy flick up that goes by the name “A good old-fashioned orgy”. Hmmm, time to make X come again! ;-)

Dear Mothers-in-law

Epilogue: I sometimes wonder what happens to girls when they become women. I mean I am yet to discover how the metamorphosis materializes for I still yearn to feel like a complete woman and give up on the crazy girl in me. But then I can’t even begin to fathom what transpires within the entire female specie when they turn into monsters-in-law...er...mothers-in-law. Damn you Hollywood movie titles playing on my mind and mouth/fingers.

Dear Mothers-in-law (yes, all of you all over, unsparingly),

Really, what genetic alteration occurs during the seven rounds of the holy fire taken by your doting sons that upshots your ghastly malfunction? You have to explain me that. It can’t be insecurities-for how can anyone even deem to stand in any competition with someone who beds a man every day at least initially and often several times in the same day. Maybe she is prettier and younger than thou, but then your aren’t a sex object for anyone anyways now and least of all for your own khoon-your son? So quit making life difficult for all of us and let your pseudo-beauty ego go for a hike.

I think the onset of wrinkles occurs in women post their promotion to this unenviable position. So much constraining of nerves to show ‘Who’s the boss!’ naturally could lead to some lines forming somewhere! And as if those obnoxious pressing of lips and scrunching of eyes and inflating of an already fat nose are not enough, you soon discover-why there’s even a tongue that can wag with unending zeal to utter some of the choicest of taunts, to put even sarcasm to shame. Aww....nobody allowed you to participate in the school debates and so in the second childhood read that as your darn old age you decided to refresh the latent skills. How charming!

But really, you need a refresher’s course in reality check. These stupid soaps you watch all day on the idiot box yes, even the damn re-runs for apparently one sob/crap watch ain’t enough for your sadistic tendencies show techniques that are long given up even by Ekta Kapoor. I mean the idea of tampering with my door closer, just so that the door remains ajar and you can overhear when I bitch about you is so lame; I have decided to do it in bed when we are tugged in a blanket together and just before sex. It ensures not only you being in your bed too by that time but also I would get an attentive hearing because of His anticipation for what may follow thereafter.

And please, please stop asking him if he wants water when you see me getting him a glass on a tray or suggest he should measure his temperature after you sly watch me washing the thermometer. Ah, the genuine concern just prior to the wife’s is so touching, it makes me weep. Please don’t force on me that he would eat the bitter gourd in dinner when I insist he won’t, just because he did when you eyed him in his days of virginity. He has better taste now, metaphorically speaking. And when he refuses like I anticipated, please shorten the always ready-to-brim-over sermon of how children these days don’t listen to their parents-yours grew up along with his manhood.

And also explain to me dearie, how on earth can he be spoilt if we go out three times a week and not spoilt if you serve him the third bowl of halwa just because it was made by you? It is so amazing that you remember to ask me such concerned questions about my health and well being only when I sit with him on the dining table or do all sort of cootchie-cooing with our baby just as his daddy returns home and ensures he gets a private viewing of this trailer that never materializes into an actual movie otherwise.

And so enlightening are your discourses on responsibility-aah, talk about how the daughter-in-law ignores the house, after you stay out of it for most of your waking hours. Talk about how you don’t get enough money to spend after you ordered a brand new pair of fat diamond studded bangles. Talk about how “we” waste money, when the clothes you got stitched in the year’s beginning are adorning the frame of the maid’s by new years. And before you find fault with the way in which I am raising my child, please don’t even let me start with the faults so glaringly apparent in the ones you did. ‘Appreciation’ I know is the toughest word to grasp in your dictionary just as ‘expectations’ is the easiest.

So now that we are sailing in the same boat, let’s stop rocking it before we both fall. Please come to terms with it that it is not YOUR age to dress up and gallivant around town and instead give us, the lesser mortals a chance too. And also let me bring to light that there are more gadgets in the house which you can use like dishwasher, washing machine and iron so that you think beyond the television and mobile phones!

How amazingly nice it would be if you would just stop staring at my “Pepsi” glass at social dos and not wonder why that glass or its refills were in my hand all night long! And when we get you gifts, kindly don’t judge them by the price but by the sentiment behind it before we lose all our sentiments to do so. While I know I suck at cooking, you aren’t doing a good job of it either by the drama you churn out instead*sniff, sniff*

I guess this is enough “bonding” for this time. Until next time then...please be good and if you can’t be, please be human!

Yours almost lovingly,

Daughters-in-law the world (India) over.

Disclaimer: This is based on a one hour chat I just had with a suffering female friend who painted a picture of her mom-in-law thus, after breaking her monologue with sobs and expletives simultaneously yes, we are weird in our sources of getting inspired. So much she cribbed and moaned that I almost felt for her poor hubby-not in THAT way of course. Any similarities to my own mother-in-law are coincidental and purely unintentional. She’s a darling-of her husband of course. Please take this in good humour or else if I get burnt with kerosene in my kitchen soon hereafter, you’ll be blamed for lightening the fire. 

Does the Sun shining on me make me Sunny?

Yesterday my dear beloved returned from a five days ka tour and very tired. We both unwind around midnight with a little time spent on the web on our respective phones before we curl each other instead and last night I finally got a peek at some sacred parts...of his phone that is, before you begin to question me about wtf was I doing with him for twelve years of our marriage then.

Now I am not a ‘Big Boss’ person or a television person per se but then Sunny Leone is as much a household name in India today as is perhaps Sonia Gandhi, for different reasons of course. Twitter went barmy with her entry and I felt compelled to watch the idiot box for an entire five minutes just to see who is firing the imagination faster than AK47 can ever dream of. But thankfully I soon lost interest in their loony tunes.

It has been ages since I watched porn yes, despite it, I am normal and not frustrated in life and she wasn’t going to make me do it, never mind her 'doing' reputation and whatever of mine too after my open declaration for my fixation with Vidya Balan in a previous post because I had opined she was drenching in hotness.

I see you raising an eyebrow at the “ages” and muttering under your breath, eh-‘Tch, tch, yes, of course, what would old people do with porn anyways?’ Phew! Narrow mindedness and prejudice would bring an end to this country faster than the upcoming elections could. Baby, why would I need outside help when I have a more than eager and flourishing help desk right here on the bed? We don’t help ourselves, we get helped all the time #perksofbeingmarried

So, yes, we are talking porn again!

At the risk of sounding old sacrifices I make for your enlightenment, I belong to the generation when porn was not downloadable my god, the auto correct did not check me, you mean to say that really is a word? We had to manually go up to a stupid CD shop and rent it out. My escapades with a group of friends to go out and rent porn have already been enumerated on some post before but then a quick recap does not harm once a teacher, always a teacher.

Those who’ve been around would recall my telling how I found video porn in my parents’ cupboard, securely tucked under a pile of clothes. That was like sher ke mooh mein khoon lagna. Nopes, that does not mean I developed a compulsive disorder for watching porn else I would succumb to forces unknown; it just fuelled the curious cat in me to want more-get to the bottom of it no puns intended. I went out like on an invisible Noah’s ark to ascertain whether the absurd things done on that video cassette were done on a regular basis in all of them or were my janam-dattas just plain lucky to have found some unique stuff. Needless to say, I now know how easy it was and maybe still is to please my simple set of parents.

Anyway, we digress!

So last night after five nights of almost lambi judai, beloved was extra kind with me and on his own, without me having to plead and trade-bargain for it, decided to show me Sunny Leone on his phone. And obviously we are not talking about her strutting around, looking all innocent and cute like two big fat buttons on Big Boss.

“Aha, she is hot and looks less dumb without clothes” is what I said before he nodded his head in agreement. I am sure he just heard the hot part and nodded too soon and didn’t bother about the dumb bit. Hot and dumb are two adjectives that men don’t mind as long as they come in combination. There were just still pictures, though I know somewhere well concealed in some stupid passwords would be the moving ones too-not those moving you to actual tears but those moving you to wetness for sure.

So I eyed some shots with my gaping mouth till beloved had to manually close it with a push of his fore-finger from under my jaw and then we judge how men cheaply open their gaps at the sight of sexy women. “Please don’t tell me you are turned on again” is what his tired face managed to mouth for now. Isshhh thank god no one heard that or saw those harrowed expressions or else they’d think what a torture the poor guy goes through in bed.

“Don’t worry, I don’t find her thaaaaat hot to give up on men altogether or emotionally blackmail you into creeping into my blanket” is what I said to console. I looked back in slow motion at beloved, whose handsome visage was marked with some concern. “I am not worried about that, though doubtful of it....but then see how unfair, such a sweet and nice and pretty girl na, I wonder why she came in this business....” Had he used any more adjectives of the ‘nicer’ kinds, I would have really done something horrible to him under that blanket. Ya, right, the next you would say that she’s so homely and I would inform you that homely does not mean one whom you want to bring home to your bed.

Poor dear beloved, sometimes I wonder why God clubbed me with such a noble, innocent soul while he was at his pairing trip. Perhaps to show the beauty of equilibrium in action! “Really! She’s too pretty for porn? Would you want to watch ugly girls in the act instead? Please don’t tell me that you would for it would make me doubt myself at having turned you on for all these years like I do?”

During the first few years of my marriage we used to rent porn at every blue moon. There was a fat, middle-aged man in our vicinity who ran a grocery store and lent pirated CDs for a side income. Needless to say with a boys hostel just outside his shop, there was more business out of “woh waale CDs hain?” than any yeh ya koi aur waale. Dear beloved also got a whiff of it post his matrimonial status. I am sure that fat ass must have thrown not-so-subtle suggestions as he was grossly suggestive even without the slightest of provocation on a general basis.

So on some Sundays a CD would be rented for a puny Rs 10 and returned back on Mondays. And on some days if beloved left in a hurry and forgot to do so or I needed some general items from his store and reached his door step, I would be greeted with a horrendous grin from the bastard as though he was running in his mind a re-run of “I know what you did last summer” with a different allusion to summer here. But then thankfully came the era of the downloadable and his unbearable grins rested in peace happily ever after.

God, I digress once more.

What were we talking again...ah, Sunny Leone!

Haven’t I spoken enough today already?

Okay, 'she’s hot' is what I muttered to some of my friends today too but apparently not or at least not so much as some Priya Rai-and here I thought my education days were done. All those really dumb jokes of Leone Vs Dharam paaji’s son Sunny had barely done a rest than the ones on Jism-2 starring madam have started doing the rounds. I guess won’t be able to resist her entry in my bedroom for long, will I?

Pardon me but it is midnight once again. Let me see if I could lure beloved into showing me some video clips and lemme play some music in the backdrop to set the mood....#Nowplaying: I’ve got a feeling-that tonight’s gonna be a good night, that tonight’s gonna be a BIG good night!

P.S. Imagine my torture now to have to go through Google images to search for a suitable picture of her to upload with this post #lifeisabitch

How bad can a little bit of Porn be?

I have a very dear friend who has shifted now to the States. When here he was a perennial source of my mirth and jollity for such was his life that epic blunders and wonders kept following him everywhere yes, kind of a carbon copy of me-I often joked that we are like twins separated by wombs. It is sad that he does not blog for his narration is exceptional and engrossing. Here is one of the leaves from his life that forms a memorable anecdote for me to always tease him with.

He (let’s call him Bhola, for this would get to his nerves for sure) was pursuing his further studies outside his quaint, little city and once was home during long vacations. His very small town had meagre sources of entertainment and his friends too had moved on to other parts of the country in search of greener pastures. So he decided to stack some actually a huge amount of porn in between his notes and bring along just in case the forlorn nights made him too lonely and the lovely simple damsels around got him too horny.

Now stashing them in the remote corners of his cupboard in the room, he went out one day to check on the developments in the city happening behind his back which basically means to check out the chicks for he cared a flying fig about the infrastructure-female structure is where his eyes stop for good. Little did he know his mommy dearest had decided to give him a surprise by introducing his chaotic room to some order. He returned home whistling in the evening struck by the smell of something alien-ish in the air. *Sniff, sniff* OHH MYY GOOD GAAAWD! Who the fuck unmessed the mess?

And immediately his popping out eyes went to the closed doors of the cupboard. In slow motion you can imagine him running now towards it with his head moving from side to side as sweat particles splattered around from the panic socked expressions of his countenance actually imagine a constipation stricken tensing of facial nerves here instead for a better understanding of the situation.

Gasping for breath, he flung open the doors in one jerky action and then picture the three times made close-up of his face with thrum-thrum-thrum imaginary backdrop thumping of the drum as happens in stupid Hindi serials. The underwear were washed, the posters of half naked women stuck on the insides were removed and worst-the notebooks were arranged in neat layers and despite moving the pages of all, there was not one CD falling out of any of them.

His first thought:

OMG-I paid half my month’s pocket money on them!

OMG-Some of them had the latest lesbian action!

OMG-How will I spend the rest of the fifteen nights here at home without them?

OMG-(never mind, too many FIRST thoughts there)

OMG-Mom!!!!????????!!!

He darted back to his mother like I do when I go to receive a phone call and end up chit chatting forgetting about milk kept on the stove for boiling not realizing that he had not thought over in his mind about what and how was he going to ask his sari clad, bindi adorning, haath mein puja ki thaali liye hue mom about it. He first took the thali from her hand lest it fell to the ground in the dramatic way shown in the movies, scattering the puja ka sindoor everywhere and extinguishing the diya because the “ghar ka chiraag” is too busy in such “mooh-kaala” activities.

He- Ma, er...did you find anything in my cupboard?

(Forget the “thank-you for cleaning my earthquake stricken zone” –ungrateful kids of this generation, I tell you)

Ma- You mean this? *And she took out the bundle of CDs from god knows where, arranged between her fingers like a neat stack of playing cards with just the right amount of cleavage popping out from each cover*

He- Ma...er...aaaa...mmmm?

Ma-So these are the sounds that I would get from you now? Quite expected! 
He- Maaaaa???? *Raising the tone in disbelief as though she’s the one doing the blasphemy here*

Ma- Yeh kya hain? *Now bringing in view a clothes-free Pamela Anderson look alike in terms of you-know-what for nobody cares two hoots about what is over them*

He- (thinking in his mind- These are the latest inventions of positions and intersections without conception but made for interjections) CDs hain ma...

Ma- I can see that...but what are they doing in your cupboard?

He- (thinking again- They should be "doing it" in the laptop and damn I should have used the laptop cover to stack them there instead) Ma, yeh notes hain!

Ma- Jhoot bol rahe ho ab?

He- Na ma na...These are Suraj’s CDs. I told him to send me the biology practicals ke CDs and by mistake he must have sent me these. I kept them away so that I could go back and return these for the originals *feeling super smug at his presence of mind*

Ma- Chee...beta, mein tumhare ma hoon!

He- Mujhe pata hain ma, meine kab DNA test maanga?

Ma- To yeh sab kar rahe ho Bombaye jaake?

He-  (Karne ka mauka he kahan mila-yeh to practise sessions hain) Ma, aap galat samajh rahe ho....

Ma- To dikha do kya hain is mein-theek se samajh lete hoon?

He- *Now raising an eyebrow at his ma’s intention in tension* Acha ab de do....aage se nahi karonga  (Me-Huh, matlab self service ki dukaan band aaj se?) and papa ko nahi bataana....

Ma- Ofcourse nahi bataana...woh TUMHAARE papa hain! Aur inko bhool jao...

She stomped off now leaving Bhola with the puja ki thaali and almost a KLPD!

And my teasing began at where she left him-

So mast na? Haaaw Bhola, imagine what and how she would have viewed you post this traumatic experience-

~Beta, bahut kamzoor ho gaya hain! (He must be overdoing THAT-I must ask Bhola ke papa to speak to him about IT)

~Itne garmi mein shorts ke jagah pajama pehna hain? (He must have just watched a CD and come...arre woh waala come nahi-Ram, Ram)

~Why is he taking so long in the bathroom? Why has he locked his room from inside? (Let me put my ears to the door to hear some moaning)

~Why is he moaning? (No he can’t have possibly slipped on the soap water left in his washroom-it has to be those karam jali kudiyan)

~Why is he refusing to get married? (Oh god, he’s having an affair with one of “those” girls...)

~Why is he insisting on twice cleaning of his room? (I must ask Shaarda bai to stop sending her daughter for cleaning and she should come instead-is ladke ka to kuch pata nahi)

Tch, tch...needless to say he never got the CDs back and whenever he grieved about them, I told him to chill, probably his mom and dad, alone in that drab town are having fun now thanks to him-aaj tak unhone sab sikhaya, kuch aap bhi unke knowledge expansion mein assistance karo! Or be positive, maybe someday when he gets married, his mom instead of handing the house keys on the first night to his bride would make her cup those CDs and say “Aaj se yeh tumhare haath mein hain-uske haath mein mat dena...” And stop looking for innuendos I am sure the poor mother won’t mean THAT what you are thinking!

And so poor Bhola, he never knew porn could land him in the Neverland-the land where he would never be seen without doubtful eyes by his ma or without mad leg pull by me!

For my 'Love Being Interviewed' Instinct!

After a long time I got tagged and found something interesting to cater to my ‘love being interviewed’ instinct...
So here is my 25 point Something-on a run and all in the name of fun!

1. If you were caught cheating, would you fess up?
There is a whole lot of ‘if’ here and there’ll be a whole lot of ‘but’ there :-)


2. When was the last time you felt honestly broken?
Is there a dishonest way of being broken too?


3. Are you craving something?
You mean besides a killer figure, travelling around the world, a blog that is read by millions and a complete stress free life? Yes, and that something knows about it ;-) *feeling super smug at creating mystery*


4. If you could have one thing right now what would it?
 A peek into some brains and a control over some others! *evil laughter*


5. Would you rather have ten kids, or none?
*Aghast expression*I would rather have Maggie, Biryani, chocolates or brownies-I mean, I know it looks like I eat but spare the poor kids for god’s sake :-)


6. When was the last time you put your foot in your mouth?
Okay, this happened recently when someone I was introduced to said he was an engineer working in Accenture (a software firm) and I asked him if they made cars (remembering the car company Accent, which I presumed for some god-damn reason, used the nickname of Accent). Alright, you can LOL now! :(
  

7. Last person to see you cry?
Has to be my beloved and he’s seen me do so, so many times that even when he sees it now he often sees through :(
Besides him many others do off and on and get to hear ‘Pyaaz kaat rahe the’ or ‘cold ho gaya hain’...thank god for onions or else half the world would be stuck up in explanations.


8. What do you do when you get nervous?
I smile and try to get away or grab whoever is nearest (please don’t ask me for what).


9. Be honest, do you like people in general?
General se waale-NO, non-general se-YEEEEES


10. Whom would you like to see at your funeral?
All those who said they loved me and all those who couldn’t (But really-SEE here is an overstatement, don’t you think?)


11. Does anyone completely understand you?
Yes, but I keep challenging their understanding every now and then!


12. Have you ever made out in a bathroom?
Yes, yes, yes...for once I am so glad I am married and can answer that without being judged! :-)
  
 
13. Do you think the last person you kissed is nice?
Du-U-H! If I had not thought so, I would not have kissed him, na? Who goes around kissing people who are not nice anyways?


14. Who was your last crush?
*Checks her watch*Damn, it is not working-can’t tell you the exact hour now, can I? :D
  

15. Love or Lust?
It’s like asking brains or beauty! I always sucked at choice questions-why can’t we say we want to have and eat our pie too, when either ways it ultimately goes in the tummy? (Okay, I didn’t understand that myself)


16. Last person to slap you?
My class teacher is Class 3 for I entered the class after recess still chomping food in my mouth. (I guess, it was then I decided to be a teacher and set an example-who slaps hungry kids or even adults for that matter?) Or wait this could also be Seeya for she often gives me the Sunny Deol waala thappad when she gets all whimsical :(


17. Are you afraid of the dark?
No, andhere se nahi, andhere mein rehne se darr lagta hain*waah, waah*


18. Is there anyone you wish was still in your life?
*Smiles*


19. Do you flirt a lot?
Define ‘a lot’ :-)
  

20. Have you found a purpose to your life?
Yes, I did and then I did again and before I could decide among the two, a third one came along-I just have too many things to do and only one lifetime to do so-life sucks!


21. What is you USP?
I can crack PJ’s, I can be a good listener, I am curious, I am witty...oh wait, you asked for one- I’m genuinely nice


22. Do you believe in Love at First Sight?
Yes *moves a hand lovingly over a new pair of shoes* and no*looks doubtfully even at those professing to be “in love” after many sightings*-all love is essentially self-love.


23. What situation for you would be like ‘Between the Devil and the Deep Blue Sea’?
Stuck between a witty guy and my beloved...err...actually that would technically not be a ‘stuck’ situation :D


24. What is your favourite part about your body?
My skin colour (sorry for being such a racist here)-if that can be a part, the rest was all created at ‘faulty by default’ settings :(


25. What was your secret ambition as you were growing up?
I wanted to be an actress and tell in interviews that since childhood I wanted to be an actress...magar, kyonki, parantu aisa ho na saka so I manage with drama in real life:-)

Alright, this was cool-please take up the tag whoever wants to!

Have a Happy Week!

Sex and a whole lot like that!

These are just some baap of random thoughts/observations concerning/alluding to sex or lack/need/desire/madness of it and a whole lot like that kinda topics!

So bachcha log, please don’t read this and if you must then please don’t blame me later for not giving you spice enough!

•         I often share posts of bloggers I like on my Facebook page and generally my friends log do read trusting my taste and instincts god help and bless them all. However, when recently I put up a link to a post entitled ‘porn nights’ there were more “likes” and comments than ever before hmmmmmm...acha ji-wink, wink, even though ironically there wasn’t any actual porn or even a whiff of it anywhere. Just the title was enough to generate curiosity and thereby clicks. Even my own most famous posts have been those with double meanings and hints of titillation do you sniff some inane pride there? so much that I have to physically stop my dainty right hand with my super dainty left hand, from typing more of just that stuff. Pooooooint is-sex sells!

•            Like it or not, believe it or not, we are a bunch of sex starved voyeuristic lot no matter how many times we rattle the bed post in the cosy confines of our homes. We by which I am generalizing and in no way stating my personal preferences get thrilled still by watching hot lip-locks on screen or hearing about whose wife was caught in bed with whom. Complete crass shows like Big Boss, evoke such mass interest because the public is waiting with bated breath to hear someone abuse another in unfathomable terms or falter from the moralistic path into a fling. A hot item number ensures saleability of music and the movie no matter how crappy the content is. Katrina and John Abrahim still rule vast dingy corners of human imagination though they can ‘not-act’ the pants off anyone. Rahul Gandhi never mind masses calling him baba...he can be many’s baby;-) is the preferred politician among the youth for he is relatively sexier looking than the rest of the one-foot-in-grave or mouth-drenched-in-tobacco lot alright, maybe I am speaking for myself here, but isn’t he really?

•            Recently a dear friend of mine was very annoyed when he went to his bank for his usual dealings. Upon questioning why, he said that they had changed his Relationship Manager to a GUY and that was most disagreeable for him, as from the last twenty years of his ‘relationship’ with the bank, he had pretty and even passable, marginally pretty females, more ready to oblige than otherwise for business of course. Another dear friend of mine does not like female instructors at the gym for she feels they do not have the understanding of the body as a male instructor does. And in my many years of discerning people and their drift, I know better than to ask them to explain their weird surmise.

•             Why, sexier people do have greater chances of being hired than the ordinary dorks! And sometimes greater chances of being fired too. In my quest for maids came a damsel of a regular height and standard weight, except the top half of her body, just below the neck was inexplicably super bestowed, accentuated more hideously by the clingy kurta that she wore. So while I spoke to her, despite all my normal tendencies, please don’t raise that eyebrow...do I still need to convince the masses of THAT? I would inevitably find my eyes juxtaposed to those humungous things that would be called breasts in normal human understanding. My god, I was wondering, did she accidently take in those injections that is rumoured to be used on mini watermelons to make them ripen into the most giant ones on the shelves in a day? And I said ‘no thank you, I don’t want you toppling over with my daughter just because the 2/3^rd of your top half might not be able to handle the rest of the 1/3^rd of the weight below’.

•            It also is true that whatever we try to smother emerges out more strongly than ever. Tell your teenage daughter to stay away from boys and surely she’d be adventurous enough to commence on that very path to know ‘why’.  Create a hullaballoo about hot scenes in a movie and indisputably it would have more than the regular takers, wanting to satiate some urge or the other, if not just the curious one. Like I remember how a whole bunch of us friends and even many other ‘selective movie goers’ also, thronged the theatres for the movie Love, Sex and Dhokha although it boasted of no star cast or anything else, except what the title sheepishly hinted at. Neha Dhupia would forever be remembered, not for any movie that she was a part of, but for a simple quote she made, “Only Shahrukh and sex sells in Indian movies!”

•            Most boys do not begin as “men” unless circumstances make them promiscuous. This I realised post my blog article on ‘My Understanding of Men and Women’ where men have been cruelly stereotyped as solely driven by their libido I am sorry, please don’t take a morcha against me to ban me or something, I do love your specie at the end of the day. There a dear blogger Anshul remarked that he did not find many traces of himself or perhaps he just had to grow up to be a “man”. Bless you for being such a nice munda, bringing hope for my despairing sisterhood not yours obviously. Like always Anshul, even your comments give me food for thought; forget about your posts which are like a sinful banquet by those standards.

   

         Anyways, I then realised that although most men would say that there is    no man who does not have sex on his mind in his relation with a woman, I almost began to beg to differ. There are still boys who want to fall in love with one girl whom they’d eventually settle down with, dream of eternal love and bed hopping is just not their game though this variety is under a serious threat of extinction and such specimens are already declared as endangered species, fiercely guarded by the owners like Kohinoor Heeras. It’s easier to find tiger’s milk than them! Or perhaps, they are yet to become men- these tendencies surface even in the boy next door, more so in the middle ages, as a cynically wise dear friend says, when you realise that you gave up the best part of your twenties believing in ideals like those of teenage girls-even the teenage girls don’t think like that anymore, he says. 

•             Recent cases of celeb infidelities have made headlines everywhere. People scrunch their noses in disdain at the Strauss-Kahn saga, from Tiger Woods okay, his tally more than anything else makes him so outrageous to Ryan Giggs and Gordon Ramsay. Actors like Charlie Sheen and Hugh Grant have ruled the roost more so with their sexual escapades. While I am in no way defending polygamy, I do sometimes feel how difficult it must be in show biz to continue tightening your leash around the flimsy slippery corners of conscience. It is okay for us lesser mortals to sit comfy in our not-so-glamorous or powerful arenas we don’t have to bear faces of a Hrithik or a Kareena, within breathing distance every day, crooning love lullaby to us and then test our god damn moralities We just have to raise an accusing finger at those who reach unfathomable heights through the sheer beauty of their countenances and body or swoon-worthy talent. It is so pleasurable to pick faults in others whereby you make an assertion of a lack of them in you, without having to say it in so many words.

I mean come on, if I were a Bill Clinton and sexy females thronging me would flirt and make passes, I would be too abnormally human to let it pass without retorting suitably back, especially after the world known established fact of my gift of gab. And no one counts the 101 times he may have resisted but the one time he could not dodge no puns intended he was crucified. Sometimes it becomes difficult to realise when the blurring lines of harmless flirting have crossed over. So before we burn their effigies, let us at least put ourselves in their shoes oh how we’d love that, won’t we?

Ranbir Kapoor is accused of being philandering. Hell! When women like Deepika Padukone, Katrina Kaif and the recent bevy of beauties associated with the Casanova, cling on him or they spend days and nights in locales that only the dreamiest of fairy tales could boast of, it should not really come as a surprise with his kind of charm. I don’t know how Sachin Tendulkar and Shahrukh have managed to not create such headlines but then do we really know the truth always?

Ordinary mortals attached to their families and living in a closer knit set ups have really no excuse to stray but the stars...they are stars after all, beyond reach and part of their appeal is the hype around them!

All I am saying here is that you can’t beat the drums about being loyal and moral till your morality has been suitably tested by something which is difficult to resist. When Vishwamitra can give in, the rest of the men are also only humans!

•          While I am not being judgemental in the above cases, I would really like to jump the bandwagon in another one. In this age of internet relationships, it is easy getting hooked and easier still is assuring privacy with a person even though it may not be “touch”-phone like easy physical. While there may be chat rooms and the likes catering to such needs of individuals, it is sad how the youth is prone to blind faith or stupid thrill of exchanging nude pictures of themselves, with such non-chalance. I try to keep an open mind in most cases and think from the other’s point of view before being driven to conclusions yet I do believe that here one needs to be a whole lot more cautious of what is sacredly hers even after trusting the other to the point of obsession.

The younger lot are more confused than ever about their own preferences and loyalty because in relationships like these, they give too much of themselves too soon and then are extremely disillusioned if it does not work out. Sexual experimentation is worse when you are ignorant of the real world and worst still if you are on the internet, speaking from a girl’s point of view. From a man’s side-How can you let go of the belief in your loyal streaks because of a couple of failed internet relationships and convince yourself that you might not have it in you to not stray and thereby stray with the most guiltless of conscience?  

Enough! So much of sex talk is making me sexy oh how I wish it was THAT easy!

So until next time when I make more sense...stay sexy! :-)

All that hoopla about Flirting-Sigh!

While rummaging around for Jawarhar Lal Nehru’s picture for the last post, Google brought to me some more interesting facts about his persona and extra-curricular activities.

Though I had sighed and cringed and pined in ‘Impressionable Reading!’ about his unfaltering loyalty and exemplary love, interestingly Google says Lady Edwina Mountbatten was not the only one who was flushed by his overflowing juices of mush, drenching many a women in ecstasy.

Hmm...Kya baat hain, Nehru ji, India’s very own n perhaps the only Casanova n charismatic Prime Minister.

The ‘stumbled upon’ post mentioned that Nehru could not help being an incorrigible flirt. Wow...path breaking-the man who wrote The Discovery of India, seems like he made many cute discoveries for his own wandering self too.

My first impulsive reaction to that was of OMG and I felt he just fell thud down from the enviable altar that I had unpretentiously sited him on.
On second thoughts*and thank god for them*I pondered over if it really was such a blasphemous sin to tarnish the poor guys’ super dapper clean stint otherwise?

Is flirting as bad as the general scrunching of noses that it evokes, followed by an unreasonable character assassination?
Could Nehru really help it, being in the enviable prime position that he was and thereby privileged to come across the crème of the society?
Many of these would have been women who were distinguished in exceptional lady like graces and would evoke praise even from their own gender...and in such a predicament, my friends....kya hua body Prime Minister ke hain to...aakhir dil to bachcha he hain na ji!

I have never tried to be a hypocrite and hide the fact that I love to flirt.
I often cite it as a favourite hobby where I feel the listeners would not be shocked into an untimely demise caused by irreversible stroke of heart failure.
Occasional flirting keeps me alive...my creative juices flowing and provides me the mind games that keep me at the edge.

And I don’t pretend to do it under covers, I make my beloved stand with me and watch me play and watch him smile.
He knows he would never find me in a bevy of ladies twittering about the mundane, but in a circle of men, bursting into guffaws for I would be enthralling with a tease*sigh for those days too as post Seeya my reins seem to suddenly go in a heartbreaking state of restraint...my own heart breaking that is, rather than of anyone else*

Of course though in most cases it is harmless and more of ‘blah, blah’ big talk than thunderous and volcanic “actions”!
*Look at my comment box for example...I never miss an opportunity!*
And whenever it has fringed on being harmful to my mangal sutra and maathe ka sindoor, I let the urges pass by and sigh some more.
*What the heck...as if by sighing less I would reduce the global warming...so I sigh to my heart’s content...er...discontent...whatever!*

My point is...why does flirting harbour in the territory of negative discretion by the so-called social guardians?
With education and self dependence, opening up of minds and perceptions, it is a very natural urge to impress the opposite sex into a belief that you are a cut above the rest in your gender.

It is an unsurpassable ego boost to have someone intellectual, be inclined to hear you for he finds you interesting enough to hold a conversation*of course in case of men, let’s say the ego boost would come by someone sexy as hell, inclined to see you for she finds you interesting enough to bed...and there we sigh again! Please don’t keep a sigh count in this post....numerically that would be a challenge and hence this statutory warning for I like my readers to have a furrow free mind*

Another point of dispute here would be the very definition of flirting.
One man’s dip may be another man’s drowning*ah...what a mind-blowing twist in the proverb...giving the world a new, blaze a trail theory...
I am so damn good that I sometimes scare myself only*

Like take me for example*yes, a scapegoat again for the experimentation to derive onto pioneering conclusions that alter the destiny of mankind*
What I term as flirting you might deem as just interesting and intriguing conversational skills and if you are crass and unintelligent and pseudo-modern, you might call me a kalank to naari-jaat!

I like to hold the interest of a man in my conversation...
I sometimes let the laughs flow like a natural cascade and smiles to remain a permanent fixture on my pretty face.
And I might unwittingly ask you questions that show my genuine interest in you. Contrary to what my blogs project, I am a better listener than a talker.
I notice, I sometimes bat my eyelids a little too innocently or use the signature handshake of my softest of hands to make a point.
As if making these things ain’t enough I also make the wittiest of repartee and rebuttals without wasting a moment of thought on it.
My voice sometimes becomes huskier than usual and somehow a twirl of a lock of hair playfully dangles down my forehead.
Alrite, maybe I don’t use all of these arsenals together but I have seen them being used and win many a quaint battles.

Of course also these are observations and not conscious deliberations.
But the frequency of these naturally occurring behaviour patterns, made me stumble upon the idea that may be I am a natural flirt and these instinctive urges flow out without so much as even an effort required from my side.

Like I said...some may deem that as just dipping my feet in the troubled waters and others might rip me apart for having the waters gone past my head already.

Flirting is an integral thread of the fabric of today’s society and anyone out there with a reasonable amount of impression made has used it to reach where he is...consciously or impulsively...in greater degrees or less...garbing it in the array of charm or flaunting it in the wake of his sexuality.

So can the moral police please rest in peace and let the flirt games begin!

P.S. I do have some standards too...so flirting with the author in the wake of this post, without the essential back-up of my list of requirements may be injurious to your health.

Missing the Kissing!

I remember preaching to you guys on the art of kissing.
If you do not...get enlightened all over again in my post “IT’S IN HIS KISS”

And I am back to KISS again...
Actually I’d prefer back to KISSING rather than to KISS or back-kissing or...er...never mind and in everyone’s sanity n better interests, let’s not discuss what “I” prefer anyways.

What’s with people now-a-days indulging in so much concentrated activity of the lips?
Ghor kalyug, I tell you!
Whooosh!
My little Seeya is growing up n it kinda bothers me.
I mean in such a scenario, you can’t have her mom being tempted by such blatant show of indulgences to deviate, can you?
Ya...I know, you know what I mean!

Yes, look around and anyone is kissing everyone or at least someone and new year’s eve is the worst time to witness such shameless outbursts of tendencies in human species much to the annoyance of those who don’t get much or enough...alrite, more than enough of it*so I am greedy...sue me!*

Gross...helloooo people, get a place for such acts that screw the happiness of lesser mortals, living with an occasional peck on the cheeks in their everyday humdrums or at least not such that take our breath away...EVERYday.
And what in God’s name is wrong with these heroines n heroes...inke ghar mein baap, bhai, ma, behen nahi hain kya?
All of them are so engrossed in lip locks that can put even the famous Raja Hindustani to shame.
Gone are the days when females squirmed watching onscreen passion in shame of those sitting around her...it is now shame of having no one to try on what you see, that is more ghastly!

And you frustrated directors-those kisses are so well focussed and zoomed in and excruciatingly prolonged that they keep us half awake half the bloody night, twisting n turning on our bed.
Who in god’s name is accountable for all that sighing that this evokes?
You are indirect contributors to global warming...bhagwan ke ghar jaake in sab ka hissab dena padega manushya.
*Okay, time for me to shut up with my lambasting before I sound frustrated*


What is with women/girls n kisses?
~We can never have enough of them*I mean I can be smooched all day n still feel it was just testing n tasting...bring on the main course*!

~With many n most of us, a good kiss is as good as the climax, of the entire act that is! If you want to go where no man has gone before, try looking for the entry on top of things instead of getting to the bottom. The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach n to a woman’s is through her lips. Any woman who denies that has never been kissed the way she should be.

~We always measure a guy’s credibility in areas otherwise through his expertise in using his lips*I am even worse, I often measure the entire guy just by a look at his lips-the lips can tell it all. And please don’t ask me more on the “measure” part* A good kisser is a lambi race ka ghoda for sure n period.

~The way a man kisses also reveals how many women he has kissed...ha, gotcha! You men think unlike women you have no tell-tales...hehe...think again. Yes, it can...for free demo please contact the owner of this site especially n only if you have full protruding delicious pink lips*and extra-stressed ‘only’ if you belong to the male gender. Women only get enlightment n no demos...call me biased, but that’s how I am*

~A kiss can unlock unknown portals of the mind n if you are lucky, also of the body*why do you think women close their eyes when they kiss, eh...time to open other things else...mmmm. If she has her eyes open n watching u, she’s not ready yet*

~Most guys suck at kisses...I mean literally n otherwise.
Many feel there’s something to eat when they open their mouths and get down to it*no puns intended*
Many have such overflowing juices by the mere brush of the lips that all those juices end up flooding your mouth....isssshhhh...the feeling of getting your mouth stuck in an unset jelly bowl is very creepy...
A bad kisser is definitely a no-miss-er;-)

Okay...so let’s ask you guys...
What has been your most memorable kiss?
What’s your kissing style?
And how do you please your man/woman/both with those things god bestowed you with under your nose?

I know you are dying to know my best kiss:
Well, at the risk of being shameless and almost flaunting it here...
I remember this one time when I was pinned against the wall and the lip lock lasted for so long that I literally got out of breath and was gasping.
It left me with such swollen lips that I could almost give Angelina Jolie a run for her money-a gentle brush of the lips that started with a pull of the lower lip, went on to a tender suck at the upper lip and then the closing in on the entire mouth and the tongues taking over in a mad frenzy rush!
Aaaaaaaaand there I go again...showing to the world why this blog needs an A-certificate:-)

But OMYYYYYYYGAAAAAAWD....I need a kiss now!
So do u mind me signing off...kisse ke zindage n maut ka sawaal hain!
Happy kissing in 2011!
Muwaaaaaaaaaaah!

A Question that needs answers

What I am going to relate here is based on a true curious case that a very dear friend of mine is going through.
My aim in this narration is not just to come to a solution for him but also to perhaps seek larger answers that might help someone else in a similar situation. I have often maintained that the internet is a very dirty place to be in and this is another validation for the same.
Also dear friend, this in no way is an attempt to seek any kind of mileage through your misery.
It is in your greater interest and also my attempt to ask my wise readers if I have rightly or wrongly guided n guarded you in this case.

My friend *let’s call him Atul* comes from a largely traditional family...you may even call them orthodox and of the old school.
He is a young boy in his early twenties living in old Delhi. He is simple, god-fearing, homely and extremely gullible for he is good with others and naively believes everything in the world is basically n essentially nice. He has just this year started his career which looks promising owing to the fact that he is very dedicated, honest n hard working.

Atul is also a bit of an introvert.
I am surprised how I was allowed to let in on his confidence for he hardly mingles much even with a handful of his friends, let alone random strangers on the net. I got in touch with him through his blog n it’s been more than a good one year since we have been kinda best of friends.
I was the only second person he had added on his Facebook friends list whom he did not know personally after another guy-friend who shares similar interests with him, as he is a musician n Atul learns n practices music himself.
He is like a kid brother whom I feel very protective of for he is so out of the way nice that it is easy for others to take advantage of him.

A few months back Atul made a big disclosure to me.
He had been troubled often by some “problem” that he would refuse to discuss and after a lot of pestering I would give up for not wanting to invade his private space*though he himself would admit that he has no reserves with me*

Atul wrote a long mail to me in all his simplicity, for he felt he had no courage to tell this to me over the phone and since we are separated by many states, it is impossible to meet him to discuss what had been gnawing his mind.

Atul revealed to me that he might be a bisexual or perhaps gay.
I was shocked...not because I have any reservations against a person’s sexual preferences...but because someone who has never had much of an exposure to the outside world, would so emphatically come to this conclusion that he just might be different from the other boys. He has never been in any relationship, is shy of girls and boys both, let alone be in an intimate situation with anyone. But rather than arguing as to how he knows it so decidedly, I chose to first make him come to terms with it*I know my fault therein*.

He said he felt it was a "curse" and he had often cried about it alone at night and felt like running away to an unknown place.
He had not disclosed this to anyone out of fear of social malice n was almost certain that I would stop communicating with him after this revelation.
I was aghast at this ridiculous assumption!
I mean in this century and in these times...someone could still feel like THAT!
It is not a curse...it is not AIDS*n even if it was*...it is not contagious...it is not devilry or treachery!
Why the f@#% would I want to break my friendship with you because of what or whom you might like to get intimate with, in your personal space?

It took a huge amount of conviction from my end to make him feel that it was normal. If he felt like that, he should come to terms with it instead of burying himself in shame, though he would have to put up a facade before the social backdrop he came from, as they would never accept it. But that does not mean he should stop being what he was. Well I said a whole lot more...which is a separate issue altogether.
After hours and days of reasoning...he felt at peace in being who he was instead of cringing at the mere thought*I should have then only realized that something was wrong but I was more to comfort him than reason with him then*
But surely he knew what he wanted.

Then last month then came another news.
He told me he was going on a ten days trip with the foreigner friend of his who was coming to India and wanted to travel around.
Atul had mentioned this very dear friend*his first internet connect* on many occasions and how having similar interests as his, Atul was taught much by this friend, let’s name him Justin.

The moment Atul said he was going away alone with Justin, is when the thunderbolt struck me.
Atul n Justin were in a relationship.
N me being me, I confronted Atul full on and asked if my suspicions were true.
Reluctantly, he agreed that they were.
There was more than just friendship.

My dilemma now is that I am thoroughly convinced that Atul is absolutely straight.
He has no gay-ish or bisexual tendencies what-so-ever.
He has been convinced by Justin with whom he has been communicating on Skype, etc through the last two years that there is more than just friendship in this case.

Justin came in Atul’s life, when he had no friends and no social life really. Justin is older, in his mid thirties, a confirmed bisexual, been in many relationships and virtually jobless for he works only when he gets assignments.
Hence he was always online for Atul to feel Justin was the friend in need n indeed.
Atul avoided Justin’s initial advances and even expressed the impossibility of the situation.
But Justin was no new bird to be fooled by chaff.
He loomed around, long enough n persuasive enough to slowly impress upon the vulnerable sensibilities of my dear friend.
He showered attention n affection on this innocent soul when he struggled to fight that void in his life and soon got led into the belief that they were meant to be together.

Atul is a conformist of the ideology that says there can be only one special someone in life and of course he is now assured that he has found that someone.
So torn between his family’s pressures to get married to a suitable girl of his community and his desire to escape, he accepted the proposal of a get-away and even got his super simple family convinced that they should let him have one trip to live his life before he gets churned by the domesticity of a nuptial knot.

He has confronted me with the information of his travelling partner after many of the arrangements already done. His parents have given a nod since his son has never asked for anything before and they feel that perhaps this might help him come out of his shell. They probably have never even heard of the “ridiculous” idea that a boy can fall in love with another boy. His elder brother is apprehensive but I am sure he feels extremely awkward about mentioning it directly to him.

I have told Atul a firm NO from my side for the trip.
I feel that he is being used by his so-called friend and Atul has a 100% chance of leading a “normal” life if he does not allow this deviation to cross his path.
Justin being a whole lot more experienced knows how to get young boys to believe that this is a soul mate thingy.

Even if his feelings are genuine, he’s been with scores of people before.
On the internet we show others only what we want them to see!
We don’t know what diseases or drugs he is bringing on board.
We know that Atul is not strong enough to resist his advances and being in closed rooms of hotels with him for ten days is like walking ahead on the axe.
His family would never accept his living with another boy, so there is no future in this what-so-ever.
And he is so morally sound n family rooted, that he would not be able to live with the idea of his family resenting him for anything.

If he goes for this trip, I fear he would return even more confused about his sexuality. It could mar his susceptible mind for good.
It might spoil his chances of trusting again.
He has had crushes on girls through college life, though never had the guts to approach anyone even for basic friendship.
He has not been attracted to any other boy except Justin.
Justin could be with boys whomever he likes...Atul is just a virginal, pure soul that is difficult to find in the modern times and hence the attraction there.
Atul has already given his consent to his parents to look for a match for him, partly due to which they agreed to send him on the trip.

Please tell me if I am over reacting or over fearing for this dear friend.
Please tell me if this trip scheduled in January would actually do him good and I should just shut up?